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  • D. Carney - Perfect to Put to silence the Puny Pleas of the Proletariat!

    My Bourgeoisie Buddies and I have searched long and far for a solution to our dreadful issues with the Proletariat's irresponsible and unreasonable demands for equality and compassion. Hark! A solution reveals itself! Upon ordering this wonderment of crowd dispersal, we were giddy and talked a fortnight (over several bottles of scotch and fine cigars) about how our lives will be so much more livable when we've silenced the working class once and for all!

    On receiving the package I squealed with glee. I took my lovely new tool outside and sprayed several unarmed, non-violent lesser people in the face several times. Let them never say that this tool cannot get the job done! Though I was unable to get them to promise to never return, based on their screaming, sobbing, and clenching of their faces, I am quite sure this tool has done the trick. No more will they request a far wage or benefits! No more will they question our business ethics (ha!), and no more will I need to pay for their children to have food in their bellies every night or their bodies free of cancer. Ha ha! My only regret is that I hadn't opted for overnight delivery! (Damn you, mounted couriers! Why don't you get REAL jobs like us?!).

    Go, proletariat! Let this tool be a warning! Go infest your diseased homes with dirt floors! If you were one of the chosen ones (like us) and not such vermin (like you), you could live such a life as us with our wondrous spray, corporate tax breaks/personhood and indoor plumbling!

  • John Q. Public Roadblock "John" - Pink Floyd's The Wall Looks At The Cost Of Success

    When this album was recorded and released, Pink Floyd were on top of the world having achieved all the success they wanted to achieve. But sometimes success has a price tag. The price tag is the "wall" which sometimes separates yourself from the rest of society. American society in particular worships success and material gain at the cost of one's physical and mental health. It also creates a kind of competition and even hostility between you and the rest of the world. That's what Dark Side Of The Moon looked at. The Wall gets more specific and tells the story of the pressures of being a rock n' roll star. Most if not all rock musicians strive for fortune and fame and hanging out with all the groupies. But sometimes that lifestyle leaves you with all your personal demons and those demons can drive you insane. Those demons may be your own responsibility or those created by family or business issues. The album begins with "In The Flesh?" and the character portrayed is a famous rock n' roll musician getting ready to go on stage. But he is suddenly confronted by all his demons such as his father getting sent off to a foreign land to go to war. This segues into "The Thin Ice". His wife comforts his newborn son telling the baby that his grandfather will be OK. The first brick in the wall is the separation he feels as his father is being sent off to war. The next brick is that of abuse at school by both classmates and teacher when he was a young boy. This type of treatment leads him ultimately to rebel against the educational system. He asks in "Mother" if he should cut himself off from all the people supposedly responsible for his tribulations. "Mother, should I build the wall?" In other words, he is asking if he should ever associate with these people again. In "Goodbye Blue Sky" the horrifying pictures of his father fighting and getting killed in the war are brought to his attention again. He then looks for something to fill in the "Empty Spaces". He tries having sex with all the groupies in "Young Lust" in order to numb his pain. He avoids all communication with the groupie back at the hotel by watching war movies on television in "One Of My Turns". Finally all the violence he sees on the television brings back to memory the death of his own father and he goes insane and starts tearing up the room. He is so beside himself that he hurls the television out of his hotel room window onto the street below. He feels remorseful of his behavior and pleads with his mate, "Don't Leave Me Now". Finally everything that drove him to his current state of mind comes back to haunt him. This is the third brick. He is so angry and upset that he avoids all physical contact with people in "Goodbye Cruel World". This closes the first half. The second half opens with him working hard to overcome his demons in "Hey You". He asks "Is There Anybody Out There?" who can help him. He returns to watching television and tries calling his wife on the phone in "Nobody Home". No one responds. He asks if there is anybody out there who can feel the pain he is feeling. He remembers somebody named Vera Lynn. He cries out against the apparent injustice of war and demands to "bring the boys back home". He then turns to drugs in "Comfortably Numb". He is given an anesthetic by the doctor to calm him down. He arrives at the show and is ready to perform no matter how severe his hardships. At the show, he weeds out the people he dislikes the most from the audience. He becomes kind of a dictator to his audience. The people who are in his favor give him a "Hail Hitler" kind of salute. After the show, he takes to the streets to weed out the "weaklings, the queens, the coons, the reds, and the Jews" of the city. These people to him are nothing but worms in his sight and must be wiped off the face of the earth. Finally, he is tried in a court of law for all the atrocities he has committed. He tells the judge that insanity was the reason for his crimes. He is then sentenced to be "exposed before his peers". The crowd in the courtroom then chants to "tear down the wall" meaning they are glad he is getting his just deserts. The wall is finally torn down and the city tries to rebuild itself. This album applies not only to rock stars but also to anybody at the top of their profession who feels constant pressure to succeed and wants to lash out at the world in the midst of this stiff competition. Such people may turn to drugs, sex, or crime for their escape. Such themes is what makes The Wall such a powerful masterpiece.